Category Archives: the spoon theory

Woman Down

It’s a beautiful fall day outside.  I can hear the children laughing and playing.  I’m confined to bed today.  I am in excruciating physical pain and emotionally I am a disaster.  My life has spun completely out of control and I’m … Continue reading

Posted in Amen, anorexic, Antibiotics, Babesia, Babesiosis, bartonella, begging for help, binge eating, bulimic, chronic illness, chronic pain, Coinfections, Death, Depraved, depression, desperate, desperate times, detox, Dying, eating disorder, eating disorders, emotional, emotions, Exhausted, Exhaustion, faking, faking being ok, Fighter, fighting back, finances, financial help, friends, getting better, getting worse, go your own way, healing, healing yourself, Hell, Help, highs and lows, I will get better!, I will win, illness, Immune problems, Journey, LBC, Life is unfair, LLMD, loneliness, Lyme, lyme disease, lyme's disease, Medical, Medication Overload, Misery, Mycoplasma, No Stamina, obsessive compulsive disorder, OCD, oral medication, oral meds, rehab, scared, sick, sick individual, Sleep Deprivation, spoon theory, spoons, staying sane, steps, suicidal thoughts, Suicide, TBD, TBDs, Team Lymestorm, the spoon theory, tickborne, tickborne diseases, ticks, Treatment, trying new stuff, Uncategorized, What to expect, withdrawl, Zombie | Tagged , , | 3 Comments

Sweating It Out

Its a sweltering hot day.  Its a dosing day.  And I had to leave the house for a prescheduled oil change on my car.  I’m sitting in the waiting area and still sweating.  Summer months tend to be the hardest … Continue reading

Posted in Amen, Antibiotics, Babesia, Babesiosis, bartonella, begging for help, being ok, Being prepared, chronic illness, chronic pain, Coinfections, eat well to be well, faking being ok, Fighter, fighting back, finding your way, food, food matters, Freaks, getting better, go your own way, growing stronger, healing, healing yourself, Help, helping yourself, herxing, holistic, homeopathic, I will get better!, I will win, illness, Immune problems, Immune system, Journey, LBC, LLMD, Lyme, lyme disease, lyme's disease, Medical, Medication Overload, Mycoplasma, No Stamina, obsessive compulsive disorder, OCD, oral medication, oral meds, Pacing yourself, reflection, sick, sick individual, Sleep Deprivation, spoon theory, spoons, staying sane, steps, TBD, TBDs, Team Lymestorm, thankful, the spoon theory, tickborne, tickborne diseases, ticks, Treatment, True love, Uncategorized, unconventional, withdrawl | 5 Comments

Crawling Out

I haven’t written in a while.  I just couldn’t sit down and focus and frankly, I just didn’t care about life for a while.  I had nothing to write.  My days consisted of laying in bed, watching Netflix, over eating … Continue reading

Posted in alone, Antibiotics, Anxiety, Babesia, Babesiosis, bartonella, Being prepared, chronic illness, chronic pain, Coinfections, depression, desperate times, disappointed, Disheartened, emotional, emotions, Exhausted, Exhaustion, Fighter, fighting back, Freaks, germs, getting better, getting worse, healing, helping yourself, highs and lows, hope, I will get better!, I will win, illness, Immune problems, Immune system, Journey, LBC, loneliness, Lyme, lyme disease, lyme's disease, Medical, Medication Overload, Misery, Mycoplasma, No Stamina, obsessive compulsive disorder, OCD, reflection, sick, sick individual, spoon theory, spoons, staying sane, TBD, TBDs, Team Lymestorm, the spoon theory, tickborne, tickborne diseases, ticks, Treatment, Uncategorized, What to expect, Zombie | 1 Comment

Babesia Blues

I’ve been down in a dark hole for weeks now.  I just finished four months of Babesia treatment.  Four long, rough months.  While I haven’t been physically herxing the mental herxing has been nearly unbearable.  I’ve been all over the … Continue reading

Posted in alone, Antibiotics, Anxiety, Babesia, Babesiosis, bartonella, begging for help, chronic illness, chronic pain, Coinfections, Depraved, depression, desperate, desperate times, disappointed, Disheartened, Dying, emotional, emotions, Exhausted, Exhaustion, faking being ok, finances, Freaks, getting worse, Hell, Help, Herx, herxing, highs and lows, I will get better!, I will win, illness, Immune problems, Immune system, Its not your fault, Journey, LBC, Life is unfair, LLMD, loneliness, Lyme, lyme disease, lyme's disease, Medical, Medication Overload, Mycoplasma, No Stamina, obsessive compulsive disorder, OCD, oral medication, oral meds, pretending, reflection, sick, sick individual, Sleep Deprivation, spoon theory, spoons, Support groups, Support\, TBD, TBDs, Team Lymestorm, the spoon theory, tickborne, tickborne diseases, ticks, Treatment, Uncategorized | 2 Comments

Where I Am Now

Its just under one month shy of when my world completely changed. January 2014 was a time I will never forget.  I had gotten the flu, my great aunt was in the hospital dying, I was still misdiagnosed with multiple … Continue reading

Posted in alone, Amen, Babesia, Babesiosis, bartonella, being ok, Being prepared, Blessed, chronic illness, chronic pain, Coinfections, Comfort, Death, Depraved, dreams come true, Dying, emotional, emotions, faking being ok, Fighter, fighting back, finding your way, Freaks, getting better, getting worse, go your own way, growing, growing stronger, healing, healing yourself, helping yourself, highs and lows, I am the fire, I will get better!, illness, Immune problems, Immune system, Its not your fault, Journey, let go and let god, LLMD, Lyme, lyme disease, lyme's disease, Medical, Mycoplasma, No Stamina, oral medication, reflection, religion, spiritual, spoon theory, spoons, TBD, TBDs, Team Lymestorm, thankful, the spoon theory, tickborne, tickborne diseases, ticks, Treatment, Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Love and Relapse

It’s about 3:30 in the morning and I can’t sleep.  I’m sick.  Sicker than I’ve been in a very long time.  Life and its recent stresses have caught up to me.  I need to release, so here I am. I … Continue reading

Posted in Amen, Antibiotics, Anxiety, Babesia, Babesiosis, bartonella, Blessed, chronic illness, chronic pain, Coinfections, Comfort, emotions, Exhausted, Exhaustion, faking, faking being ok, Fighter, fighting back, getting worse, I am the fire, I will get better!, I will win, illness, Immune problems, Immune system, Its not your fault, IV infusion, LBC, let go and let god, Life is unfair, Love, Lyme, lyme disease, lyme's disease, Medical, Mitch Albom, Morrie Schwartz, Mycoplasma, No Stamina, oral medication, oral meds, Pacing yourself, pretending, religion, sick, sick individual, Sleep Deprivation, spoon theory, spoons, steps, Support\, Survival, TBD, TBDs, Team Lymestorm, thankful, the spoon theory, tickborne, tickborne diseases, ticks, Tuesdays With Morrie | Leave a comment

Phoenix Rising

The last several months I haven’t been myself.  Too tired, too depressed, too suicidal to do anything. My days were taken minute by minute in a battle to survive the damage that my brain and body have endured. I found … Continue reading

Posted in alone, Amen, Babesia, Babesiosis, bartonella, being ok, Being prepared, Blessed, chronic illness, chronic pain, Coinfections, Death, Depraved, depression, desperate times, disappointed, Disheartened, Dying, emotional, emotions, Exhausted, Exhaustion, faking, faking being ok, Fighter, fighting back, finding your way, Freaks, friends, getting better, getting worse, go your own way, growing stronger, healing, healing yourself, Hell, Help, Herx, herxing, hope, I am the fire, I will get better!, I will win, illness, Immune problems, Its not your fault, Journey, LBC, let go and let god, Life is unfair, LLMD, loneliness, Lyme, lyme disease, lyme's disease, Medical, Medication Overload, Misery, Mycoplasma, No Stamina, oral medication, oral meds, Pacing yourself, poisonpeople, pretending, rain, Real People, reflection, sick, sick individual, Spiritual, Spiritualty, spoon theory, spoons, staying sane, suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Support groups, Survival, TBD, TBDs, Team Lymestorm, thankful, the spoon theory, tickborne, Uncategorized | 2 Comments