Category Archives: Meditation

All The Things Left Unsaid…

This post will be different from the others I have written. It’s not just an update this time. It’s also a reflection and in a way, an apology. It’s been 2 years and almost 2 weeks since I arrived home … Continue reading

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Returning to Life

I took a lot of time off from writing (too much time.)  At first it wasn’t really intentional.  Life was happening and it was chaotic and busy and I wasn’t checking in. I was more focused on living my life … Continue reading

Posted in Amen, anorexic, Antibiotics, Babesia, Babesiosis, bartonella, being ok, binge eating, bulimic, chronic illness, chronic pain, Coinfections, Comfort, detox, eat well to be well, eating disorder, eating disorders, emotions, Fighter, fighting back, finding your way, food, food matters, friends, go your own way, growing, growing stronger, healing, healing yourself, Help, helping yourself, highs and lows, holistic, homeopathic, hope, I am the fire, I will get better!, I will win, illness, Immune problems, Immune system, Its not your fault, IV infusion, Journey, Klinik St. Georg, LBC, let go and let god, LLMD, Love, Lyme, lyme disease, lyme's disease, Medical, Medication Overload, Meditation, Mycoplasma, nature, No Stamina, obsessive compulsive disorder, OCD, oral medication, oral meds, Pacing yourself, paleo, pretending, psychic, psychic abilities, reflection, religion, sick, sick individual, spiritual, Spiritual, Spiritualty, St Georg Klinik, St. Georg Klinik, staying sane, steps, supplies, Support groups, Support\, Survival, TBD, TBDs, Team Lymestorm, thankful, tickborne, tickborne diseases, ticks, Treatment, trying new stuff, Uncategorized, unconventional, What to expect | Tagged , | Leave a comment

Psych Ward : Part 2

I’ve made a very difficult decision today.  I am going to post my “journal” from my time in the psych ward last year when my ammonia levels where exuberantly high.  No one had ever seen them before today when I … Continue reading

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What Is Wrong With Me?

What is wrong with me? That’s a question I get from just about everyone and one that I ask myself maybe too often.  I know my diseases.  I know them well.  After all, we’ve spent half of my life together … Continue reading

Posted in Antibiotics, Anxiety, Babesia, Babesiosis, bartonella, being ok, Being prepared, Blessed, chronic illness, chronic pain, Coinfections, Comfort, eat well to be well, emotional, emotions, Exhaustion, faking, faking being ok, Fighter, fighting back, finding your way, food, food matters, Freaks, getting better, go your own way, growing, growing stronger, healing, healing yourself, helping yourself, Herx, herxing, holistic, homeopathic, hope, I will get better!, I will win, illness, Immune problems, Immune system, Its not your fault, Journey, letting go, LLMD, Lyme, lyme disease, Medical, Medication Overload, Meditation, Mycoplasma, nature, obsessive compulsive disorder, OCD, oral medication, oral meds, Pacing yourself, pretending, psychic, psychic abilities, Purium, reflection, religion, right brain, sick, sick individual, spiritual, spoon theory, spoons, staying sane, steps, Support groups, Support\, Survival, TBD, TBDs, Team Lymestorm, Ten Millions Voices, thankful, the spoon theory, tickborne, tickborne diseases, ticks, Treatment, Uncategorized, unconventional, What to expect, yoga | Tagged , , , | 2 Comments

Unconventional Road to Health

I am intense.  I always have been.  I can be laid back but always in an intense kind of way.  After all I am a Virgo.  There are certain traits about myself that I just love and this happens to … Continue reading

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Birthdays, Dosing, Healing & Psychic Abilities

In a couple of weeks, I’ll be a year older…I’ll start my personal new year.  Just as many people do during the coming of the “official” new year, every year (usually starts about a month before my actual birthday) I … Continue reading

Posted in alone, Amen, Antibiotics, Anxiety, Babesia, Babesiosis, bartonella, being ok, Being prepared, Blessed, chronic illness, chronic pain, Coinfections, Comfort, Death, emotional, emotions, Fighter, fighting back, finding your way, food, food matters, Freaks, friends, getting better, go your own way, growing, growing stronger, healing, healng yourself, helping yourself, holistic, homeopathic, hope, I am the fire, I will get better!, I will win, illness, Immune problems, Immune system, Its not your fault, Journey, LBC, let go and let god, letting go, Life is unfair, loneliness, Love, Lyme, lyme disease, Medical, Meditation, Mycoplasma, nature, obsessive compulsive disorder, OCD, oral medication, oral meds, Pacing yourself, poisonpeople, pretending, psychic, psychic abilities, Purium, Real People, reflection, religion, rivers, sick, sick individual, spiritual, Spiritualty, staying sane, steps, TBD, TBDs, Team Lymestorm, thankful, tickborne, tickborne diseases, ticks, Treatment, True love, trying new stuff, what life's about, yoga | 2 Comments

Stuck In Between

I’m stuck. Some days its more like being trapped.  The last few months have been pretty much a living nightmare.  I’ve had so many set backs with treatment.  My body is worn out and my brain is a mess most … Continue reading

Posted in alone, Antibiotics, Anxiety, Babesia, Babesiosis, bartonella, being ok, Being prepared, Blessed, chronic illness, chronic pain, Coinfections, Comfort, Death, desperate times, disappointed, Disheartened, Dying, emotional, emotions, Exhausted, Exhaustion, faking, faking being ok, Fighter, fighting back, finding your way, food, food matters, Freaks, friends, getting better, getting worse, go your own way, growing, growing stronger, healing, healng yourself, Hell, helping yourself, holistic, homeopathic, hope, I will get better!, I will win, illness, Immune problems, Immune system, Its not your fault, Journey, LBC, left brain, let go and let god, Life is unfair, LLMD, loneliness, Love, Lyme, lyme disease, Medical, Meditation, Misery, Mycoplasma, nature, obsessive compulsive disorder, OCD, oral medication, oral meds, poisonpeople, pretending, rain, rainstorms, Real People, reflection, religion, right brain, rivers, sick, sick individual, Sleep Deprivation, spiritual, Spiritualty, spoons, staying sane, steps, suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Support groups, Support\, Survival, TBD, TBDs, Team Lymestorm, Ten Millions Voices, thankful, thunderstorms, tickborne, tickborne diseases, ticks, Treatment, True love, Uncategorized, what life's about, withdrawl, yoga | 6 Comments

Death by Tick?

I am sick. Very sick. Again. I keep hiding things that I shouldn’t be.  I’m not accurately communicating even when I try my hardest.  Today has been filled with lots of tears.  My plate and cup are overflowing with guilt … Continue reading

Posted in alone, Amen, Anxiety, Babesia, Babesiosis, bartonella, Blessed, chronic illness, chronic pain, Coinfections, Comfort, Death, Depraved, disappointed, Disheartened, Dying, Educate, emotional, emotions, ER, Exhausted, Exhaustion, faking, faking being ok, Fighter, fighting back, food matters, Freaks, friends, germs, getting better, getting worse, go your own way, growing, healing, healng yourself, Hell, Help, helping yourself, hope, I am the fire, illness, Immune problems, Immune system, Its not your fault, Journey, LBC, left brain, let go and let god, letting go, Life is unfair, LLMD, loneliness, Love, Lyme, lyme disease, Lzzy Hale, Medical, Medication Overload, Meditation, Morrie Schwartz, nature, No Stamina, obsessive compulsive disorder, OCD, oral medication, oral meds, Pacing yourself, poisonpeople, pretending, psych ward, reflection, religion, right brain, Shaman's Harvest, sick, sick individual, Sleep Deprivation, spiritual, steps, suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Support groups, Survival, TBD, TBDs, Team Lymestorm, Ten Millions Voices, thankful, tickborne, tickborne diseases, ticks, Treatment, True love, trying new stuff, Tuesdays With Morrie, Uncategorized, what life's about, withdrawl, yoga, Zombie | Tagged , , , | 3 Comments

Psych Ward

This is hard one for me and one I struggled with as to whether to discuss, but I promised myself I would be open and honest about my journey through my illness and treatment.  I needed some time to process … Continue reading

Posted in alone, Amen, Anxiety, Babesia, Babesiosis, bartonella, begging for help, being ok, Being prepared, chronic illness, chronic pain, Coinfections, Comfort, Depraved, desperate, disappointed, Disheartened, Educate, emotional, ER, Exhausted, Exhaustion, faking, faking being ok, Fighter, fighting back, Freaks, friends, germs, getting better, getting worse, go your own way, growing, growing stronger, Halestorm, healing, Hell, Help, helping yourself, hope, I am the fire, I will get better!, I will win, illness, Immune problems, Immune system, Its not your fault, Journey, LBC, let go and let god, letting go, Life is unfair, LLMD, loneliness, Love, Lyme, lyme disease, Lzzy Hale, lzzyhale, Medical, Meditation, Misery, No Stamina, obsessive compulsive disorder, OCD, oral medication, oral meds, Pacing yourself, poisonpeople, pretending, psych ward, reflection, right brain, sick, sick individual, Sleep Deprivation, Spiritual, Spiritualty, spoon theory, spoons, steps, suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Support\, Survival, TBD, TBDs, Team Lymestorm, tickborne, tickborne diseases, ticks, Treatment, Uncategorized, what life's about, What to expect, withdrawl, Zombie | Tagged | 6 Comments

Deprived, Depraved, Depressed, Disheartened

I haven’t been sleeping well again. And I haven’t been taking care of myself.  I’m falling into old patterns and trying to stop them.  I’m putting the needs/wants of others before my own health. I’m trying to establish and ENFORCE … Continue reading

Posted in alone, Antibiotics, Anxiety, Babesia, Babesiosis, bartonella, being ok, Being prepared, Blessed, chronic illness, chronic pain, Coinfections, Comfort, Depraved, desperate, desperate times, disappointed, Disheartened, emotional, emotions, Exhausted, Exhaustion, faking, faking being ok, Fighter, fighting back, Freaks, friends, germs, getting better, getting worse, go your own way, growing, growing stronger, Halestorm, healing, healng yourself, Hell, Help, helping yourself, holistic, homeopathic, hope, I will get better!, I will win, illness, Its not your fault, Journey, LBC, left brain, let go and let god, letting go, Life is unfair, loneliness, Love, Lyme, lyme disease, lyme's disease, Lzzy Hale, Medical, Medication Overload, Meditation, Misery, nature, No Stamina, obsessive compulsive disorder, OCD, oral medication, oral meds, Pacing yourself, poisonpeople, pretending, reflection, religion, right brain, sick, sick individual, Sleep Deprivation, spiritual, spoons, steps, Survival, TBD, TBDs, Team Lymestorm, thankful, the spoon theory, tickborne, tickborne diseases, ticks, Treatment, True love, trying new stuff, Uncategorized, what life's about, What to expect, withdrawl, yoga, Zombie | 5 Comments