Category Archives: pretending

What Is Wrong With Me?

What is wrong with me? That’s a question I get from just about everyone and one that I ask myself maybe too often.  I know my diseases.  I know them well.  After all, we’ve spent half of my life together … Continue reading

Posted in Antibiotics, Anxiety, Babesia, Babesiosis, bartonella, being ok, Being prepared, Blessed, chronic illness, chronic pain, Coinfections, Comfort, eat well to be well, emotional, emotions, Exhaustion, faking, faking being ok, Fighter, fighting back, finding your way, food, food matters, Freaks, getting better, go your own way, growing, growing stronger, healing, healing yourself, helping yourself, Herx, herxing, holistic, homeopathic, hope, I will get better!, I will win, illness, Immune problems, Immune system, Its not your fault, Journey, letting go, LLMD, Lyme, lyme disease, Medical, Medication Overload, Meditation, Mycoplasma, nature, obsessive compulsive disorder, OCD, oral medication, oral meds, Pacing yourself, pretending, psychic, psychic abilities, Purium, reflection, religion, right brain, sick, sick individual, spiritual, spoon theory, spoons, staying sane, steps, Support groups, Support\, Survival, TBD, TBDs, Team Lymestorm, Ten Millions Voices, thankful, the spoon theory, tickborne, tickborne diseases, ticks, Treatment, Uncategorized, unconventional, What to expect, yoga | Tagged , , , | 2 Comments

Birthdays, Dosing, Healing & Psychic Abilities

In a couple of weeks, I’ll be a year older…I’ll start my personal new year.  Just as many people do during the coming of the “official” new year, every year (usually starts about a month before my actual birthday) I … Continue reading

Posted in alone, Amen, Antibiotics, Anxiety, Babesia, Babesiosis, bartonella, being ok, Being prepared, Blessed, chronic illness, chronic pain, Coinfections, Comfort, Death, emotional, emotions, Fighter, fighting back, finding your way, food, food matters, Freaks, friends, getting better, go your own way, growing, growing stronger, healing, healng yourself, helping yourself, holistic, homeopathic, hope, I am the fire, I will get better!, I will win, illness, Immune problems, Immune system, Its not your fault, Journey, LBC, let go and let god, letting go, Life is unfair, loneliness, Love, Lyme, lyme disease, Medical, Meditation, Mycoplasma, nature, obsessive compulsive disorder, OCD, oral medication, oral meds, Pacing yourself, poisonpeople, pretending, psychic, psychic abilities, Purium, Real People, reflection, religion, rivers, sick, sick individual, spiritual, Spiritualty, staying sane, steps, TBD, TBDs, Team Lymestorm, thankful, tickborne, tickborne diseases, ticks, Treatment, True love, trying new stuff, what life's about, yoga | 2 Comments

Stuck In Between

I’m stuck. Some days its more like being trapped.  The last few months have been pretty much a living nightmare.  I’ve had so many set backs with treatment.  My body is worn out and my brain is a mess most … Continue reading

Posted in alone, Antibiotics, Anxiety, Babesia, Babesiosis, bartonella, being ok, Being prepared, Blessed, chronic illness, chronic pain, Coinfections, Comfort, Death, desperate times, disappointed, Disheartened, Dying, emotional, emotions, Exhausted, Exhaustion, faking, faking being ok, Fighter, fighting back, finding your way, food, food matters, Freaks, friends, getting better, getting worse, go your own way, growing, growing stronger, healing, healng yourself, Hell, helping yourself, holistic, homeopathic, hope, I will get better!, I will win, illness, Immune problems, Immune system, Its not your fault, Journey, LBC, left brain, let go and let god, Life is unfair, LLMD, loneliness, Love, Lyme, lyme disease, Medical, Meditation, Misery, Mycoplasma, nature, obsessive compulsive disorder, OCD, oral medication, oral meds, poisonpeople, pretending, rain, rainstorms, Real People, reflection, religion, right brain, rivers, sick, sick individual, Sleep Deprivation, spiritual, Spiritualty, spoons, staying sane, steps, suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Support groups, Support\, Survival, TBD, TBDs, Team Lymestorm, Ten Millions Voices, thankful, thunderstorms, tickborne, tickborne diseases, ticks, Treatment, True love, Uncategorized, what life's about, withdrawl, yoga | 6 Comments

Death by Tick?

I am sick. Very sick. Again. I keep hiding things that I shouldn’t be.  I’m not accurately communicating even when I try my hardest.  Today has been filled with lots of tears.  My plate and cup are overflowing with guilt … Continue reading

Posted in alone, Amen, Anxiety, Babesia, Babesiosis, bartonella, Blessed, chronic illness, chronic pain, Coinfections, Comfort, Death, Depraved, disappointed, Disheartened, Dying, Educate, emotional, emotions, ER, Exhausted, Exhaustion, faking, faking being ok, Fighter, fighting back, food matters, Freaks, friends, germs, getting better, getting worse, go your own way, growing, healing, healng yourself, Hell, Help, helping yourself, hope, I am the fire, illness, Immune problems, Immune system, Its not your fault, Journey, LBC, left brain, let go and let god, letting go, Life is unfair, LLMD, loneliness, Love, Lyme, lyme disease, Lzzy Hale, Medical, Medication Overload, Meditation, Morrie Schwartz, nature, No Stamina, obsessive compulsive disorder, OCD, oral medication, oral meds, Pacing yourself, poisonpeople, pretending, psych ward, reflection, religion, right brain, Shaman's Harvest, sick, sick individual, Sleep Deprivation, spiritual, steps, suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Support groups, Survival, TBD, TBDs, Team Lymestorm, Ten Millions Voices, thankful, tickborne, tickborne diseases, ticks, Treatment, True love, trying new stuff, Tuesdays With Morrie, Uncategorized, what life's about, withdrawl, yoga, Zombie | Tagged , , , | 3 Comments

Psych Ward

This is hard one for me and one I struggled with as to whether to discuss, but I promised myself I would be open and honest about my journey through my illness and treatment.  I needed some time to process … Continue reading

Posted in alone, Amen, Anxiety, Babesia, Babesiosis, bartonella, begging for help, being ok, Being prepared, chronic illness, chronic pain, Coinfections, Comfort, Depraved, desperate, disappointed, Disheartened, Educate, emotional, ER, Exhausted, Exhaustion, faking, faking being ok, Fighter, fighting back, Freaks, friends, germs, getting better, getting worse, go your own way, growing, growing stronger, Halestorm, healing, Hell, Help, helping yourself, hope, I am the fire, I will get better!, I will win, illness, Immune problems, Immune system, Its not your fault, Journey, LBC, let go and let god, letting go, Life is unfair, LLMD, loneliness, Love, Lyme, lyme disease, Lzzy Hale, lzzyhale, Medical, Meditation, Misery, No Stamina, obsessive compulsive disorder, OCD, oral medication, oral meds, Pacing yourself, poisonpeople, pretending, psych ward, reflection, right brain, sick, sick individual, Sleep Deprivation, Spiritual, Spiritualty, spoon theory, spoons, steps, suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Support\, Survival, TBD, TBDs, Team Lymestorm, tickborne, tickborne diseases, ticks, Treatment, Uncategorized, what life's about, What to expect, withdrawl, Zombie | Tagged | 6 Comments

Deprived, Depraved, Depressed, Disheartened

I haven’t been sleeping well again. And I haven’t been taking care of myself.  I’m falling into old patterns and trying to stop them.  I’m putting the needs/wants of others before my own health. I’m trying to establish and ENFORCE … Continue reading

Posted in alone, Antibiotics, Anxiety, Babesia, Babesiosis, bartonella, being ok, Being prepared, Blessed, chronic illness, chronic pain, Coinfections, Comfort, Depraved, desperate, desperate times, disappointed, Disheartened, emotional, emotions, Exhausted, Exhaustion, faking, faking being ok, Fighter, fighting back, Freaks, friends, germs, getting better, getting worse, go your own way, growing, growing stronger, Halestorm, healing, healng yourself, Hell, Help, helping yourself, holistic, homeopathic, hope, I will get better!, I will win, illness, Its not your fault, Journey, LBC, left brain, let go and let god, letting go, Life is unfair, loneliness, Love, Lyme, lyme disease, lyme's disease, Lzzy Hale, Medical, Medication Overload, Meditation, Misery, nature, No Stamina, obsessive compulsive disorder, OCD, oral medication, oral meds, Pacing yourself, poisonpeople, pretending, reflection, religion, right brain, sick, sick individual, Sleep Deprivation, spiritual, spoons, steps, Survival, TBD, TBDs, Team Lymestorm, thankful, the spoon theory, tickborne, tickborne diseases, ticks, Treatment, True love, trying new stuff, Uncategorized, what life's about, What to expect, withdrawl, yoga, Zombie | 5 Comments

Pretending

I purposely haven’t blogged in a while.  In fact, I have avoided most contact except with my close family and friends (both mostly by phone) for the last month.  I haven’t checked my email.  I have barely been seen on … Continue reading

Posted in alone, Antibiotics, Babesia, Babesiosis, bartonella, being ok, emotional, emotions, ER, faking, faking being ok, fighting back, Freaks, getting better, go your own way, growing stronger, healing, herxing, I will get better!, letting go, loneliness, Lyme, lyme disease, Mitch Albom, Morrie Schwartz, oral medication, oral meds, pretending, spiritual, TBD, TBDs, Team Lymestorm, tickborne, tickborne diseases, ticks, True love, Tuesdays With Morrie, Uncategorized, what life's about, withdrawl | Tagged | Leave a comment